apple i-store has a function where you can find celebrities and their favorite playlists. it gives you a bit of an insight into their personalities.
i had a look at russell crowe’s. do you know what’s number one in russell crowe’s playlist? his own crap song that he’s trying to promote.
what a wanker!
what,... a,... wanker!
no punchline. just wanted to point out that russell crowe is a wanker.
what on earth are you doing?
is it wrong to enjoy your own funk? i am enjoying my own funk.
have you ever wondered how many donkeys it would take to raise the titanic?
i can’t say that i have, no. am i right to assume these donkeys would be "pining for the fjords"?
unless you know of a special breed of underwater donkey?
it turns out that when the body of a donkey decays, it produces and retains far more gas than any other creature.
this is why donkey farmers have to puncture and bury any dead ones they find because they become hazards to low flying aircraft.
do you ever get bored of speaking shit 24/7?
what? no, it’s all true. we’ll be rich! maybe we could get some from your uncle. he’s into donkeys isn’t he?
in a manner of speaking.
your brother-in-law is away an awful lot. his daughter is growing up now, lillee isn’t really a baby anymore. does she ask after him? oh, what’s his name? i can never remember.
yeah, you know who.
voldemort!? my sister married the dark lord?! jesus, why didn’t anyone tell me?
you freak! why can’t we have a simple conversation anymore without you going mental? my mother was right, i should have stuck with my tamagotchi.
no time to talk, i have to practice my shield charms.
hotdogs for dinner!!
chicken hotdogs,.. instead of pork.
you knew hotdogs weren’t made of dogs didn’t you?
*cough* *cough* *hurk*
tyler, are you ok?
just a couple of hairballs, i’ll be fine.
how on earth...? i thought you were going out today to prove me wrong about getting high from licking frogs or more specifically, toads.
*hurk* and i did! i’ve been licking ... frogs?
have you got any idea how many dogs i’ve licked today!?
ah, the scientific method, i’ll have my moron, ’à la descartes.’
fur is murder so no-one wears fur anymore,..
but cats are a menace to our indigenous wildlife.
we should start a business that sells cat furs.
that is,.. a horrible idea.
i’m going to check if the domain name ’hellokitty.com’ has been taken yet.