Fuck
You
My
Darling
F#@$ You, My Darling!
created by Dan Beeston.
' TICK! '
written by
Dan
tick!
:Monigue says: what the hell is that noise?
tick!
,Tyler news.,Monique talk.
tick!
:Tyler says: i was just doing what you asked for!
tick!
,Tyler talk.,Monique silent.
tick!
:Monigue says: you misheard me! i said "i wish you had a bigger,..."
tick!
,Tyler silent.,Monique talk.
F#@$ You, My Darling!
created by Dan Beeston.
' Cows With Guns '
written by
Goatlord
:Tyler says: it’s during times like these, i wish i had a tactical nuclear device.
:Monigue says: uh-huh.
,Tyler talk.,Monique news.
:Tyler says: oh, absolutely. i could achieve so much--
:Monigue says: --for yourself.
:Tyler says: of course.
,Tyler talk.,Monique news.
:Monigue says: it’s a pity i’m the one with the tactical nuclear device then, isn’t it?
:Tyler says: bah!
,Tyler angry.,Monique talk.
F#@$ You, My Darling!
created by Dan Beeston.
' A murder of Crowe '
written by
Dan
:Tyler says: apple i-store has a function where you can find celebrities and their favorite playlists. it gives you a bit of an insight into their personalities.
:Monigue says: sounds interesting.
,Tyler talk.,Monique coffee.
:Tyler says: i had a look at russell crowe’s. do you know what’s number one in russell crowe’s playlist? his own crap song that he’s trying to promote.
:Monigue says: what a wanker!
:Tyler says: what,... a,... wanker!
,Tyler talk.,Monique talk.
no punchline. just wanted to point out that russell crowe is a wanker.
,Tyler silent.,Monique silent.
F#@$ You, My Darling!
created by Dan Beeston.
' Funk Yeah! '
written by
Goatlord
:Tyler says from offstage: *sniff* *sniff*,
*sniff* *sniff*
:Monigue says: what on earth are you doing?
,Tyler none.,Monique query.
:Tyler says from offstage: is it wrong to enjoy your own funk? i am enjoying my own funk.
:Tyler says from offstage: *sniff* *sniff*,
*sniff* *sniff*
,Tyler none.,Monique shock.
:Tyler says from offstage: *sniff* *sniff*,
*sniff* *sniff*
:Monigue says from offstage: *hurk*
,Tyler none.,Monique none.
F#@$ You, My Darling!
created by Dan Beeston.
' Fly my Pretties! '
written by
Goatlord
:Tyler says: have you ever wondered how many donkeys it would take to raise the titanic?
:Monigue says: i can’t say that i have, no. am i right to assume these donkeys would be "pining for the fjords"?
:Tyler says: unless you know of a special breed of underwater donkey?
,Tyler talk.,Monique talk.
:Tyler says: it turns out that when the body of a donkey decays, it produces and retains far more gas than any other creature.
:Tyler says: this is why donkey farmers have to puncture and bury any dead ones they find because they become hazards to low flying aircraft.
,Tyler talk.,Monique query.
:Monigue says: do you ever get bored of speaking shit 24/7?
:Tyler says: what? no, it’s all true. we’ll be rich! maybe we could get some from your uncle. he’s into donkeys isn’t he?
:Monigue says: in a manner of speaking.
,Tyler talk.,Monique talk.
F#@$ You, My Darling!
created by Dan Beeston.
' You can’t pick your family’s nose. '
written by
Goatlord
:Monigue says: your brother-in-law is away an awful lot. his daughter is growing up now, lillee isn’t really a baby anymore. does she ask after him? oh, what’s his name? i can never remember.
:Tyler says: my brother-in-law?
,Tyler query.,Monique talk.
:Monigue says: yeah, you know who.
:Tyler says: voldemort!? my sister married the dark lord?! jesus, why didn’t anyone tell me?
,Tyler shock.,Monique talk.
:Monigue says: you freak! why can’t we have a simple conversation anymore without you going mental? my mother was right, i should have stuck with my tamagotchi.
:Tyler says from offstage: no time to talk, i have to practice my shield charms.
,Tyler none.,Monique angry.
F#@$ You, My Darling!
created by Dan Beeston.
' Hotdogs '
written by
Dan
:Tyler says: hotdogs for dinner!!
:Monigue says: chicken hotdogs.
,Tyler slygrin.,Monique talk.
:Tyler says: hot chicken?
:Monigue says: chicken hotdogs,.. instead of pork.
,Tyler query.,Monique talk.
:Tyler says: hot pigs?
:Monigue says: you knew hotdogs weren’t made of dogs didn’t you?
:Tyler says: *gaspie*
,Tyler shock.,Monique talk.
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