Fuck
You
My
Darling
F#@$ You, My Darling!
created by Dan Beeston.
' Decisions, Decisions. '
written by
Goatlord
:Tyler says: "it has been alleged in the ’dr death’ inquiry that a patient’s life support had been turned off because dr death needed the bed space."
:Tyler says: good for him, saving all those taxpayer dollars.
:Monigue says: tyler, that’s an incredibly heartless thing to say. what if it had been one of your relatives that he murdered?
,Tyler news.,Monique talk.
,Tyler slygrin.,Monique silent.
:Monigue says: ok, let me rephrase that.
,Tyler slygrin.,Monique talk.
F#@$ You, My Darling!
created by Dan Beeston.
' Filing Cabinet '
written by
Dan
:Monigue says from offstage: i can’t find my passport.
:Tyler says: it should be in the filing cabinet.
,Tyler news.,Monique none.
:Monigue says from offstage: aha! it’s probably in this folder marked ’monique’.
:Monigue says from offstage: hey, wait a second,..
:Monigue says from offstage: this is a file full of insults? are you keeping a file full of insults in reserve that you can use on me?
,Tyler guilty.,Monique none.
:Tyler says: i guess i just put my spare time to good use.
:Monigue says from offstage: you are such a freak.
:Tyler says: and you are my muse.
,Tyler coffee.,Monique none.
F#@$ You, My Darling!
created by Dan Beeston.
' Doh re me fa so la TIIIIIII! '
written by
Goatlord
:Monigue says: what are you doing tyler?
:Tyler says from offstage: i’m watching the next door neighbour’s front yard.
:Monigue says: the car guys yard?
,Tyler none.,Monique query.
:Tyler says from offstage: yeah. i’ve noticed that when he finishes doing up one of his hot rods, he’ll leave it on his front yard all innocent and unprotected like.
:Monigue says: unprotected like? have you been hanging out with jeff foxworthy?
:Tyler says from offstage: funny. no, you know those strange, high pitched sqealing noises we hear occasionally?
,Tyler none.,Monique talk.
:Monigue says: you mean it’s not been you looking in the mirror?
:Tyler says from offstage: oh, she’s in rare form tonight. i think our neighbour has been testing some customized anti-theft dev...oh dear lord, is that a claw?!
:Monigue says: i wonder if the vienna boys’ choir knows about this? it would save a lot in training costs.
,Tyler none.,Monique coffee.
F#@$ You, My Darling!
created by Dan Beeston.
' Happy Place '
written by
Goatlord
:Monigue says: hmmm.
,Tyler none.,Monique news.
:Monigue says: ahhh.
,Tyler none.,Monique coffee.
:Tyler says from offstage: i’m home!
:Monigue says: oh so close.
,Tyler none.,Monique talk.
F#@$ You, My Darling!
created by Dan Beeston.
' Rats '
written by
Dan
:Monigue says: ick! there are rat droppings in the house. you’re the one who insists on living in squalor, do something about it.
,Tyler coffee.,Monique talk.
the next morning
snap!
:Monigue says from offstage: aaaaaaaagh! mother f,....
,Tyler news.,Monique none.
:Tyler says: yep, definately no rats on her side of the bed.
:Monigue says from offstage: ,,.. ucker!!!!
,Tyler news.,Monique none.
F#@$ You, My Darling!
created by Dan Beeston.
' Hightower!! '
written by
Goatlord
:Tyler says: ok, well i’ll be off. ooo! i thought we agreed to a "no gluing bodily parts to inanimate objects" treaty.
:Monigue says: yes and you agreed to a cessation of your "no pants" policy.
:Tyler says: my pants are in the dryer because someone put holes in the bottom of the cup i use to rinse with after brushing my teeth.
,Tyler shock.,Monique news.
:Tyler says: ok, you’ve had your fun now, tyler has learnt his lesson. solvent?
:Monigue says: surprisingly less so as the years progress. damn this materialistic society we live in. well this has been fun but i really must dash off to work.
:Tyler says: i guess i could unbolt the seat in the volvo and drive to work like this.
,Tyler talk.,Monique slygrin.
:Monigue says from offstage: i left you some solvent in my coffee mug. tootles.
:Tyler says: all i see is an atreides that i want to ki..*hack* *cough* *splutter*
:Monigue says from offstage: oopsie, did i say my coffee mug?
,Tyler coffee.,Monique none.
F#@$ You, My Darling!
created by Dan Beeston.
' Karma '
written by
Dan
:Monigue says: do you believe in karma?
,Tyler news.,Monique query.
:Tyler says: the mythical force that balances out all bad deeds with cosmic punishment? lord no!!
,Tyler query.,Monique silent.
:Tyler says: i can’t remember ever doing anything bad enough to warrant this marriage.
,Tyler news.,Monique angry.
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