we need tivo. why? | it makes suggestions for shows based on what you like. tivo figures out what kind of person you are. we already know what kind of "person" you are. | i was hoping it could tell us what manner of demonspawn you are, o’ watcher of reality shows. one with good taste, o’ watcher of pro wrestling. |
care to explain why the tivo is full of pay-per-view porn set in world war two? i could take a guess... | last week, you recorded saving private ryan. and you recorded showgirls. twice. |
what happened to the tivo, darling? i reset it, and recorded hours and hours of will & grace, and it still suggests home improvement and mechanic shows. so i tossed it. | um, why? i read that tivo can prove you’re gay. | no such luck for you, butch. curse my heterosexuality. indeed. |
you filthy, rag whore, dog fucking slut! eat shit you dirty, ring raiding, nugget punching, mouldy arsed, elephant groping, necrophiliac! | sheep herding, felafel rapist! holy shit! are you as turned on as i am? last one upstairs felches first. | hey no fair! |
so...you wanted to be gay? maybe. | but, you like girls. relative to what? |
american idol. there can be only one. who will it be? | the one with the sharpest sword, perhaps? | charlie’s angels. there can be only three. no, tyler. oh c’mon! they’re gagging for it. |
we’re having people for dinner next saturday so don’t make any last minute plans. again? | we only do this every few weeks and it’s not like we go out of our way to do things as a couple. there’s the hamster thing. yes, there is the hamster thing. | can we at least stay away from the jones family. i’ve had mrs jones stuck in my teeth all week and an irritable bowel. i’m sure she was a vegan, the bitch. ok then, how about the pavarottis? they’ve just emigrated from italy. hmmm...it has been a while since we’ve had some good italian. |