 candyman. candyman. candyman. candyman. candyman.  | helen? she’s downstairs big guy. | it’s always been you helen. bastard!  |
| candyman. candyman. candyman. candyman. candyman. | helen? she’s downstairs big guy. | it’s always been you helen. bastard! |
 , , monique! what’s the big idea swapping some arty farty video with my favourite cheerleader movie?!moi? | , , yes you! why don’t you do something useful and answer the phone!i think you’ll find it’s for you dear. | fine! whatever!hello? yes. what?! oh, you muthafu...  |
donkeys are by far the best source of vitamin q the world has ever seen. i know this because my family has been breeding donkeys for the past 17 generations.  | phantasms eat regularly to help keep those annoying monkey burgers at bay. remember what they say, "a monkey burger a day, helps keep the giraffes from eating your small intestines while you sleep." | lazy!  |
| when i lick the noodles of my mind, i immediately understand life. i become life. to lick the noodles of my mind is to understand perfection as seen from the lickable noodles of my mind. i lick therefore i am. | reform no other before me, i am as the wind through the undergarments of life. i am the undergarments of life. i blow therefore i lick therefore i am. so it is written, so shall it be, forever more. | ah-monkey. |
| i want your soul.my soul? i don’t think so. | you wanted to marry me, you wanted my love. i gave you my love as you gave me yours. your love is mine, and no others. i want your soul!my soul is my own. without it, i am not me. how may i freely give my love to you if i am... not? | i want your soul!i... |
i left the house this morning and my volvo wasn’t handling very well.i suspected that my steering had become unbalanced so i pulled over and do you know what i found? | supermarket trolley wheels!supermarket trolleys wheels. someone had replaced my wheels with supermarket trolley wheels.that was me. | no shit! |
| hi there, is this tyler?yes? who’s this? good news tyler! on behalf of radio station 67.8fm you’ve won the opportunity to benefit from over $5000 worth of goods for an initial outlay of only $35 | good news friendly telemarketer. thanks to my new inbound call tracking system you’ve "won" the opportunity to benefit from the fact that i work at a gun store and i get cut-price weaponry and ammunition. erm,..don’t worry, you don’t have to do anything. we’re already on our way. | *click*i’m going out sweetie.aw no, killing telemarketers? he’s going to want sex tonight. |