"nose biting is said still to be practised in micronesia. while nose biting is a well described phenomenon, this is not the case with bites to the penis,..." pity. | chew my domesticated beast of burden. i am not eating your vomit tyler. vomit? | yes you’re very clever but i refuse to "chew your yak." oh, no, what i meant was, bite my ass, y’know donkey, ha ha. fine, just forget it. perhaps i can get the yak to take lessons from the micronesians. |
dear? why did the bank send us a ’thank-you’ letter for taking out a second mortgage on the house when we haven’t taken out a second mortgage? i needed some money to finance a new project i’m working on. | your going to finance your own movie by remor... you did it to buy more beads didn’t you? beads. | it’s a very unhealthy obsesion monique. whilst i admit the bead underpants are extremely stimulating, i think you should sto.. beads! |
did you get that game from your friend for the dinner party on friday? no. what? he said we could borrow it. we even invited the little prick to the dinner. | he changed his mind. he said it was in his car and that he was kind of using it. he’s using a board game in his car? can’t he see over the steering wheel? who knows? look, he’s just a little prick. | oh for chet’s sake! this always happens. i guess we’ll just have to play cards, again! i’m really getting sick of playing strip poker with your parents monique. you and me both. *shudder* |
from the creator of ’pearl harbor’ and ’armageddon’,... transformers, the live action film. | next he’s going to travel back in time and steal all your toys. *sob* |
beginning of token ’fourth wall breaking’ strip. | i am in a comic strip. hey! so am i. | end of token ’fourth wall breaking’ strip. |
tyler, do you remember what we did with the futon? | futon? isn’t that what you measure the atomic mass of tofu in? | i had no idea tofu was on the periodic table. oh yeah, it’s like number thirty-three or something. |
do you know what today is tyler? oh wow, thanks, i’d almost forgotten. today is the day of the nose. | it’s the day the whole world celebrates your filthy, enormous, wart ridden, nose! excuse me but my nose is dainty and precious. well... it is now. | it’s the day of the nose, the day of the nose, hooray for today as it’s the day of the nose! no dancing on the coffee table, bacon boy. |