i want to lick your nose. i want to lick your nose. | i want to lick your nose. i want to lick your nose. | i want to lick your nose. moo. |
maybe we could get fit by riding bikes. gosh! that takes me back. that last time i rode a bike was,... | ,..oh, yes. my buck’s night. | ah, the memories. |
how do you make a dog meow? put it in the freezer for three days, pull it out then run it across a band saw. meeeeeeow! | you thieved that from george smilovici. it’s called "paying homage" dear. how about this one then, what do dogs say when they spontaneously combust? | woof |
you’re so boring. all you ever do is watch tv and read the paper. why aren’t you more exciting? much as i hate agreeing with you, i do believe that there are a host of unfinished hobbies in the attic, awaiting my return. | a week later it’s nice to see that you’re working on your hobbies. i see you’ve dug out both the telescope and the cameras. | wait a second,... |
oh my god! kylie minogue has been diagnosed with breast cancer. | well, she should have kept them out of the sun. | it’s not the first time her breasts have created a blood-fed growth. ew! mmm, cancery! |
...she said what? "my pet monkey has better handwriting skills than you and he uses his own fecal matter as a medium." that’s what i thought you said. wow, that’s a little disturbing. | thanks monique, talking to you has really helped. your handwriting is atrocious, get over it. the bigger picture is eluding you at present, isn’t it? you want to have a go at my artwork now? | tyler, an old friend of yours has a pet monkey, that she communicates with, using alphabet poo. yes but...oh, right. well, that’s one less card to send out at christmas i guess. |
they say, poor handwriting stems from a mind working so fast that the hand just can’t keep up. they say that? that’s what they say. | well, it’s funny you should mention that because i heard, they say poor handwriting stems from chronic masturbation. they say that? that’s what they say. | it’s quite possible that they are full of shit. you never know. |