penelope was my grandmother. i've told you, billy bob, call me penny. my apologies penny | where have you been? we were starting to worry when you didn't come home last night. yeah dude, where are my 'shrooms? | i have just come from the i believe the colloquial term is outhouse nevermind. | i've never been in there, seeing as we'll never get to use it. it really should have been explored sooner there are a great many magazines of use in there | what sort of- -any porn? | i did notice a few periodicals of a pornographic nature laters! |
by Lliam Amor, Dan Beeston and the Goatlord.
©2009 Dan Beeston
One of the more satisfying uses of a magazine, I've so far discovered, is when a sizeable issue of "4WD Monthly" is rolled up to assist in a violent altercation with a peeping Tom.
My friend's elderly girlfriend was so grateful to be rid of her furtive voyeur that she offered to pay for my next year's subscription.
(By "friend" we all know I mean "deranged stranger I was unfortunate enough to be accosted by as I got off the bus" and by "4WD Monthly" we all know I mean "FHM: Furry Hot Marmosets")