Bubble Wrap

you're staying? with the girl who tased you multiple times?
the crucial parts of that sentence was "with the girl", not "tasered".
tased.
what? no! tasered.
look, if you 'laze' in the sun you are said to have 'lazed'. the person 'lazing' would be the 'lazer'.
the person lasering? what like cyclops?
look fine. it doesn't matter. do what you want. i'm going back to base.
you should totally stay here with us. there's plenty of foob. i'm sure it would be fine with beth.
beth?
with delight. it's best when the prayers are done in groups of three. the trinity can divide between themselves in hearing our thanks.
see professor? you'd be doing us a,..
professor?
i'm sorry beth. all this is a bit too much for him. i think he's a bit dazered.

by Dan

I'm excited about Swine Flu. Currently Swine Flu has been a bit of a beat up by the media. It's a little bit more virulent than a normal bad flu and has a very similar mortality rate. Finally though, the fear-mongering of the media has been useful.

Now people are wearing masks. They're staying home when they're sick. They're washing their FUCKING HANDS!!

I was once at a pub enjoying $5 jugs of beer. I went to the bathroom and washed my hands. I scrubbed then with soap then washed them until the soap residue was gone. Approx. 20 seconds of washing. Some one actually made a comment along the lines of "Careful mate. You'll wash you hands right off."

He then proceeded straight out into the pub again WITHOUT WASHING HIS HANDS. I exclaimed this to my sister on the day and she told me that many girls leave their cubicle, then fix their hair, then wash their hands. They do this because fixing their hair with wet hands would ruin their 'do'. Rather than having bad looking hair they'd prefer to have FECAL MATTER AND URINE IN IT!!

It's basic hygiene people. And if I die from a hybrid of Bird Flu and Swine flu I'm blaming you.

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