big things are coming for you, eh? wha? why? | chinese new year. year of the cock! | shh, listen closely. that’s the sound of no-one laughing. |
have you ever eaten goat? with or without horns? | what’s eating you? |
you look flustered, you haven’t actually been running have you? quickly, close the blinds! i hear footsteps, do you hear footsteps? | they switched your decaf at work again huh? it was awful, i was out the back but i could distinctly hear the guy ask for a ’phased plasma rifle in the 40 watt range’ so i hightailed it out of there. | idiot. i’m going to hide under the bed now. if anyone comes to the door, your name is ’sarah’ |
just what is paul robinson up to on the latest episode of super celebrity porn neighbours? | his elbow? | ow...hurties |
all men are evil. | women are tools of satan. | kitties are nice though. |
i met a beautiful woman today who offered me one million dollars for one night with my husband. really? | so... | ...so i shot her with my taser and had her taken away to the loony bin. nooooooooooo! |
cling wrap over the toilet, tyler? it’s the classics that are the best. happy valentine’s day. | you’re thinking of april fool’s day. i always get those confused,.. | i wonder why. |