,..well, you’re a festering boil on the arse of humanity,.. database addressing error,.. | okay jon, i won’t eat the lasanga that’s a good cat | munch munch munch oh, i hate mondays |
arrr, me land lubbin’ wench. though a fine one it be, what be you doin’ buyin’ fer ye’self a new car? *sigh* | my boss thought it would be a good idea to park his disgustingly large humvee on top of my astra. after i returned his testicles, he hired a new mercedes r-class for me to drive whilst he has my car repaired. arrrrrr! | oh, i see, very clever dear. r341i53 /\/\y 1337 c0mic 5ki11z! |
my boss said he wanted to lick my anus. what?!! | he’d better have been joking! oh, yes,.. | he said it was all tongue in cheek. what!!?? |
*burp* woah, must be my nuts coming up. | cashews, i had some cashews earlier. filthy girl. uh-huh. | there’s a joke somewhere in there about your balls having never dropped but to be quite honest, i couldn’t be stuffed. rude. |
hello, is this the tyler-monique residence? | unfortunately. we need you to come collect your intoxicated husband from the local police station. | he was found asking a tree for sex, and claiming to be "the lizard queen". *sigh* again? i’ll bring the cage... |
hello? am i comin’ to practice? fo’ shizzle s-bear. ’cow man 7’ will ride again! | yeah, i’m walking. we just got these new cordless phones. they can be used anywhere in the house, they’re great. tyler don’t take it in there ... tyler! | ahhh. where am i now? let’s just say it’s a relief to have access to such a technological convenience. s-bear? monique, i just lost my call. i don’t think the phones work in here. oh, i’m sure they do ... grot. |
i think our house is haunted. too much tv for you, young man. | no, seriously. something keeps turning things off. like what? | well, first it turned off my sex life, then my love for you, then my will to live. now it just has to turn off your mouth. |