Fuck
You
My
Darling
F#@$ You, My Darling!
created by Dan Beeston.
' Something Flowery '
written by
Goatlord
:Tyler says: mmmm, reading each new ’harry potter’ book is like putting on a favoured old coat or perhaps a brand new pair of woollen socks. they feel so warm and snuggly, very easy to slip into.
,Tyler talk.,Monique news.
:Tyler says: although, the same could be said of a two dollar whore.
:Tyler says: but we won’t.
,Tyler talk.,Monique silent.
,Tyler slygrin.,Monique news.
F#@$ You, My Darling!
created by Dan Beeston.
' Foolishness '
written by
Goatlord
:Tyler says: what are you watching?
:Monigue says from offstage: ’monk,’ yet another dopey american detective show.
,Tyler talk.,Monique none.
:Tyler says: does he spell his name with a silent ’e’ and ’y’?
,Tyler slygrin.,Monique none.
:Monigue says from offstage: begone git!
:Tyler says from offstage: ooo, ooo, ooo!
,Tyler none.,Monique none.
F#@$ You, My Darling!
created by Dan Beeston.
' Lie to me baby! '
written by
Goatlord
:Monigue says: ok, i’ll bite. what’s got you so steamed?
:Tyler says: the patent office rejected another of my applications! it was the best one yet!
,Tyler angry.,Monique talk.
:Tyler says: how could they reject a "vaginal sneakoscope"?!
,Tyler angry.,Monique query.
:Tyler says: oh, c’mon!
,Tyler query.,Monique headinhands.
F#@$ You, My Darling!
created by Dan Beeston.
' Politeness '
written by
Dan
:Monigue says: i want you to be on your best behaviour at this dinner party tonight.
:Tyler says: of course. you can trust me.
,Tyler slygrin.,Monique talk.
later that night.
:Monigue says from offstage: i can’t believe you!! i can’t take you anywhere!!
,Tyler none.,Monique none.
:Tyler says: what the hell is your problem? all i did was say that i liked her hat.
:Monigue says from offstage: she is a siamese twin.
:Tyler says: oh,.. that would explain why it was so life like,...

,..and foul mouthed.
,Tyler query.,Monique none.
F#@$ You, My Darling!
created by Dan Beeston.
' Horsy Jerky '
written by
Goatlord
:Monigue says: "nose biting is said still to be practised in micronesia. while nose biting is a well described phenomenon, this is not the case with bites to the penis,..."
:Monigue says: pity.
,Tyler query.,Monique news.
:Tyler says: chew my domesticated beast of burden.
:Monigue says: i am not eating your vomit tyler.
:Tyler says: vomit?
,Tyler talk.,Monique talk.
:Monigue says: yes you’re very clever but i refuse to "chew your yak."
:Tyler says: oh, no, what i meant was, bite my ass, y’know donkey, ha ha. fine, just forget it.
:Monigue says: perhaps i can get the yak to take lessons from the micronesians.
,Tyler talk.,Monique talk.
F#@$ You, My Darling!
created by Dan Beeston.
' BEADS! '
written by
Goatlord
:Tyler says from offstage: dear? why did the bank send us a ’thank-you’ letter for taking out a second mortgage on the house when we haven’t taken out a second mortgage?
:Monigue says: i needed some money to finance a new project i’m working on.
,Tyler none.,Monique news.
:Tyler says: your going to finance your own movie by remor... you did it to buy more beads didn’t you?
:Monigue says: beads.
,Tyler talk.,Monique talk.
:Tyler says: it’s a very unhealthy obsesion monique. whilst i admit the bead underpants are extremely stimulating, i think you should sto..
:Monigue says: beads!
,Tyler talk.,Monique angry.
F#@$ You, My Darling!
created by Dan Beeston.
' The Bare Facts '
written by
Goatlord
:Tyler says: did you get that game from your friend for the dinner party on friday?
:Monigue says: no.
:Tyler says: what? he said we could borrow it. we even invited the little prick to the dinner.
,Tyler talk.,Monique guilty.
:Monigue says: he changed his mind. he said it was in his car and that he was kind of using it.
:Tyler says: he’s using a board game in his car? can’t he see over the steering wheel?
:Monigue says: who knows? look, he’s just a little prick.
,Tyler talk.,Monique talk.
:Tyler says: oh for chet’s sake! this always happens. i guess we’ll just have to play cards, again! i’m really getting sick of playing strip poker with your parents monique.
:Monigue says: you and me both. *shudder*
,Tyler angry.,Monique talk.
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