what are you doing tyler? i’m watching the next door neighbour’s front yard. the car guys yard? | yeah. i’ve noticed that when he finishes doing up one of his hot rods, he’ll leave it on his front yard all innocent and unprotected like. unprotected like? have you been hanging out with jeff foxworthy? funny. no, you know those strange, high pitched sqealing noises we hear occasionally? | you mean it’s not been you looking in the mirror? oh, she’s in rare form tonight. i think our neighbour has been testing some customized anti-theft dev...oh dear lord, is that a claw?! i wonder if the vienna boys’ choir knows about this? it would save a lot in training costs. |
hmmm. | ahhh. | i’m home! oh so close. |
ick! there are rat droppings in the house. you’re the one who insists on living in squalor, do something about it. | the next morning snap! aaaaaaaagh! mother f,.... | yep, definately no rats on her side of the bed. ,,.. ucker!!!! |
ok, well i’ll be off. ooo! i thought we agreed to a "no gluing bodily parts to inanimate objects" treaty. yes and you agreed to a cessation of your "no pants" policy. my pants are in the dryer because someone put holes in the bottom of the cup i use to rinse with after brushing my teeth. | ok, you’ve had your fun now, tyler has learnt his lesson. solvent? surprisingly less so as the years progress. damn this materialistic society we live in. well this has been fun but i really must dash off to work. i guess i could unbolt the seat in the volvo and drive to work like this. | i left you some solvent in my coffee mug. tootles. all i see is an atreides that i want to ki..*hack* *cough* *splutter* oopsie, did i say my coffee mug? |
do you believe in karma? | the mythical force that balances out all bad deeds with cosmic punishment? lord no!! | i can’t remember ever doing anything bad enough to warrant this marriage. |
this frickin’ holistic medicine crap. i can’t believe it’s still legal to advertise things like a ’magnetic cure’. you’re a non-believer then? there’s no rational reason anyone should feel better after ’magnet therapy’. | that evening,.. hard drive failure? hard drive failure?? | my screenplay!! mmmm, i do feel better. |
so, what was in the big box the postie dropped off? i ordered the hard cover, "adult" edition of the harry potter books. ok, fan boy. let’s just skip the part where you explain why you need the "adult" versions when you already have the original, brightly coloured ones and instead, you can tell me what the difference is between the two. | it’s really very simple, dear. the "adult" version contains all the really good stuff they couldn’t print in the children’s version. such as the special love hermione has for hagrid, what dumbledore really likes to do with his phoenix and what actually happened in the chamber of secrets between harry, ginny and the "giant serpent." | you couldn’t lie straight in a coffin could you? do you know what the original title for book one was? "harry potter and the philosopher’s bone" |