well, i’m off fishing. | aren’t you a bit optimistic using those over-sized hooks? i just like a situation where those with the biggest mouths are punished. | what the hell is that supposed to mean? whoops! gotta go. |
wasn’t ’eternal sunshine of the spotless mind’ wonderful and romantic? meh! it just prompted such intriguing questions. | meh! erasing memories. what a strange notion. hey tyler, what memories would you have deleted? | this conversation would make a nice start. fucker! whoa! déjà vu! |
aaaaaaargh! | you prick! you think it’s funny to replace my bathroom mirror with an aquarium containing a dugong? not as funny as the fact that it’s been there two days already. fuck you, tyler. | ancient sailors mistook them for mermaids. blow me! big fat hairy mermaids. |
did you just say ’nothing’? i didn’t say anything. no, did you just say,. ’nothing’? | the word ’nothing’? no damnit!! did you speak, but not say anything at all? start making sense baldy or i’m packing you off to a home. |
have the baskervilles moved in next door? i don’t believe so. well, i just...ah, i don’t suppose you know anything about the large, glowing canine next door? | it’s funny you should mention that monique. when i was a young lad, my friend and i would delight in painting the neighbourhood pets all the colours of the rainbow. these days, however, i have many more years under the belt, a bigger bank account and access to a disgustingly large hardware store where i may purchase fluorescent spray paint and uv light globes to suit street lamps. the revolution starts here, baby! that’s really quite inventive tyler, but... | ...but? i’m just trying to get past the fact you had a friend when you were young. i did give him half my pocket money every week. |
you know how you said it was a mistake to plant a genetically modified herb garden? if i remember correctly, i told you that it was ’screwing with the laws of nature’. | i hate to say this, but i think you might have been right. well well well, so mister infallible has an archillies heel. so what brings this bout of ecological gallantry? | tyyyyy-leeeeerrr! maybe you should ask it. |
,..then i’ve got an appointment at the solarium, then it’s off to the beauty parlor for a skin peel. point one, that’s the most retarded waste of time i’ve ever heard of. | point two. what the hell are you trying to do recapture your youth? it’s not like you were that pretty then either. at least i don’t try to recapture someone else’s youth. | good god! you let him go? i told you that o’donnally woman wasn’t getting her son back until she cleaned up her footpath!! three words tyler. crime. against. humanity. you’ll make us look soft. now, where did i put my taser. |