i thought i asked you to stop using my invisibility potion? it doesn’t grow on trees you know. well ok, it does grow on trees but it’s really hard to find, seeing as you can’t see it, see? | well? | i’m in the other room, moron. |
cool gadgets, fast cars, hot women? james bond really is the complete male fantasy. | of course the best bit is that whenever he has a one night stand someone creeps in, under the cover of darkness and murders the girl before things get awkward. that’s very cynical tyler. | hey! say what you want, i’ve never seen a scene where james bond leans over then whispers in her ear,.. soo, ah,.. this has been great,... um,.. should i call you a cab? |
you’re not psychic, are you? no, i’m not. | good. don’t even think about it. | you said you weren’t psychic! i’m not psychic. you’re just predictable. |
i understand that ’normal’ is a relative term but your family gatherings are just... so... completely... fucked! that’s a fair comment. i must say that when i was a young lad, i would dream that my midget, trapeeze artist, biological parents would whisk me away one day to a life of high flying adventure in the circus. i wish. | your cousin will has changed though. i remembered him as being... hippie scum? i was going to say, a bit alternative but yes, hippie scum would be more accurate. | yeah, his new girlfriend is heavily into anime. my aunt calls it his, "chubby, junkfood eating, robot phase." i always liked her. i guess that explains the hair. oh no, they’re just freaks. |
your stupid dog snatched the meat off the bench today. oh stuart, you rascally canine. | at any rate, we’re having stu for dinner. that’s fine. i quite like stew. | wait,.. what? |
that teacher friend of yours is an absolute riot. wow, can that man tell a joke! there was this one, a right corker.. yes, dylan has managed to be the life of any party for as long as i’ve known him but tyler dear, how many times do we have to go through this? you. can’t. tell. jokes. | nah, this one is sheer brilliance. i can’t go wrong. what’s better than doing the horizontal folk dance with a 16 year old schoolgirl? ...nothing! ha, fantastic. you know it’s funny, because it’s... | the pain! hi, therese? your daughter is in dylan’s class this year right? yeah, about that... |
oh shit! my alarm didn’t go off. oh god, i’m late! sorry. must have bumped it last night. | ahh! you bastard, i had a morning meeting with-- with brad pitt. yes, you told me many, many times last night. |